What is actually happening?

What is going on?
I don't get it.

What am I talking about?
Is the dizziness that striked me quite often this while!
It was the usual Friday night that I sat train heading back to my hometown.
What make it so unusual is that I felt so uncomfy up to the point that I wanted to get out from the train immediately!
Maybe not so outraged, but there is this stuffy feeling in my chest.
They wanted to come out!
How dare them!
I was struggled with them for the whole journey.
And I gained my victory where I can make it until I reached home!
They did gain their independence as well.
To their should-be-there direction - inside towel bowl!

RELIEVE!
I start to enjoy the pull-out-everything feeling.
It really led to great relief.
That's how I kept my body in such good fit?
No no no! I'm not in that extreme.

Stepped in my house(hometown), my mum said that dad got sick after went dinner last weekend.
I was shocked.
Maybe because it happened such a long period, or maybe its the late informed.
What kind of sickness, I asked.
Dizzy in this few days, and got fever in the beginning, she replied.
I felt relieved, at least it is not something serious.
Strange thing is that, I have this thought came across me, in the mean time I being informed.
How if he really leave me?
How if... he just gone...
without given me much time to prepare.
I never dared to imagine that.
I never thought of that day would come.
You and me are so clear that that day will comes no matter what.
Still, I afraid to take that fact, it will never register into my head.

I know, that it will be an insane me, if the day would ever come.
My fingers get heavier and heavier to typing all this kind of stuff.
My mood, as well.
Change, change, change, change topic~

Okay, let's talk about my grammar.
Somehow, I got a chance from this person,
to be indirectly as my private english teacher,
marking my article.
Sadly, this is the first time and will be the last.
My papers were marked terribly with bad grammatical remarks.
Now I realized how badly my English are.
Self-esteem sustained damage?
Not at all!
It motivate me more rather than negative striking.
I feel there is strong need for me to improve on my English.
Maybe this is what chinese saying, get even tougher with the increased challenge and downside.
Talking about my grammar,
I can honestly telling you that the only thing I can proud of,
is that I can differentiate noun, verb, adjective, and... nothing more.
Yeah! Really nothing more. Maybe there are more, but I just can't figure out what else.

Presentation on this coming Monday,
yet to feel nervous.
Mentioned "yet", because I knew that I am going to be f***ing GanJiong,
with my hand shaking so hard and heart beating fast.

Wish me Good Luck~
Started to get use with writing blog.
Continue to work on it!
yeah, yeah, YEAH!