Blogger kid. @@

Copy a movie "Blogger boy"- I am the blogger kid.
Hope I won't get sue because of this. @@~
By the way, I　am just kidding, because I　can't think of any title,
this was kind of spontaneous.

Shifted new house.
It is for sure a brand new experience,
not in the sense that because it is "new",
but rather It was the experience that staying
with people that I never been staying with before.

Not a very spectacular experience,
but just a feeling that　it is somehow a change,
though it is not a very big change.

Actually, found myself that I am really hard to be persistent
to stick with the plan and do what I have planned.
Procrastination is never a novel topic for me,
long way through, it appears all the time.
Someone does said that, we can't eliminate procrastination.
What we can do, is actually only reduce it.
Quite discourage, isn't it?
This habit is definitely has its very destructive power on me.
My assignments been delay,
my studies, my works, almost everything.
As long it was a plan,
it will forever be still a plan.
Painful experience as I have sacrifice so much of my time,
but yet I still static in the same surface.

Never really have a real confrontation toward myself.
Maybe I am really a coward that trying to avoid every conflict.
Afraid to face the truth that I am a failure.
Does it mean that I have already view myself as a Loser?
Guess so.
Wonder such characteristic will drag me out from the hell,
or give me no seat in heaven.
To actually will push me further to seek for perfection,
or leads me jump into the vicious cycle of self-esteem downturn.

Talking about assignment, there are things that have to keep as memory.
It has been a never ever such good experience that I　gained compared
to previous assignment.
Not that it was fun, but I do and really learn a lot in the process.
Conflicts happened, and furthermore it is not among strangers,
but rather between friends.
Really felt thankful that actually someone brought it up,
rather than keep it all up with ourselves, and gain nothing in the end
but continue to be as a rough rock.
Diamond have to shaped real hard before it could shine eternally.
So do we.
Someone might view this page of life as a failure and dark spot.
But I do treasure it, as it let me felt that I am still living
and I still need to dependent to the air and breath.

What's going on?
Each of us were actually concerned that ours said were not being listened.
It has been ignored.
Else who will not getting upset having been in such situation?
We were part of the human force, we do have feelings,
and thus we felt upset also.

It is really important to heard what is someone's inner feeling.
We will never know if he/she was never going to open it up.
It is really shocked to know that,
everyone has such intense feeling beneath their surface,
and yet, they seem not having any problems.
Yup, it is definitely very dangerous,
as feelings can escalated and accumulated.
Little sand built Wonder.
Never ignored little detail of feeling.
No thing is nothing.
Even a tiny rats could drive the elephant crazy.

Feel that this post is so random as I also have no direction to focus on.
But guess what? I don't care at all.
Because it is my blog. Kaka.
I can write whatever I want and like,
and yet, no one have control over it.
Unless the admin so goddamn hate me,
and trying desperately to delete my blog site
which that will never happen. ~.~
Till then.